Pretty much everyone has done something Christmasy by now, but I’m jumping on the bandwagon anyway.
I’ve been told I have a flair for poetry, particularly for this one I did last year. And since ’tis the season, I figured I would show it here. It’s written in the style of The Night Before Christmas. And as per my own tradition, there’s a little something for you at the bottom… well, there was supposed to be, but Fileden is being a bitch. So that’ll have to wait.
T’wasn’t the night before Christmas, but I didn’t care.
I was busy making a video beyond compare
To Shippidge, or MALR, or Villanjo,
How it’d be done in time, I didn’t know…
The videos were posted on YouTube with care,
In hopes that the viewers would soon be there
To see, rate and comment, but not criticize,
But none of these videos had reached my eyes.
I was busy on the computer, fingers a-blazing,
Making this video (it’ll be amazing!)
I worked and worked without delay,
It wasn’t easy, suffice it to say.
The time was near, I was almost done.
So I went to bed, waiting for the sun…
Later that night, there arose a quiet “bing”,
I got lazily up; I was too tired to spring.
A glow from my monitor signaled it was active,
But when I took a look, my voice jumped 6 octaves.
I’d left the video to save overnight,
And you won’t believe this horrific sight…
A virus had come and infected the contraption,
As I read the screen, I almost had a crap-tion!
The video didn’t save, a tragedy beyond belief,
Now I have to redo it, oh good grief!
I sat on my bed with my face in my palms,
Doing everything I could to remain calm.
Just when I thought all hope was gone,
There came a sight, my beacon had shone.
The door opened and light filled the room,
A figure stood there, his voice was a boom:
“Ho, ho, ho!” was what he said,
His jolly tone lingered in my head.
Behold, Saint Nick! Or Santa if you prefer.
“What’re you doing here?” I dared to concur.
He grinned and said, “I see you’ve got a problem.”
I nodded and said, “I think it’s the modem…”
He squeezed by me over to the computer,
And Philips in hand, “What’s he doing?” I wondered.
From his magic sack he pulled something out…
A computer part, I thought without a doubt.
He unscrewed the sides and took it apart,
Seeing my computer disassembled, it tore at my heart.
So he worked his magic, and before I could blink,
He stood up and said, “Well, what do you think?”
My jaw dropped open, what a sight to behold,
The transformation of my computer of old.
All shiny and new, it looked quite fancy,
I had to try it out, I was getting real antsy.
I clicked the power button, and I shouted with joy,
The machine was better, faster, stronger… oh boy!
But none of that compared to this next thing,
The movie was back, I thought I would sing!
I turned to say something, but when I did,
He had vanished, where could he have hid?
I dashed to the living room, and under the tree
Was a pile of presents, as big as can be.
I looked out the window in time to see
Him flying away through the snowy sea.
He called to the world, while singing a tune,
“Merry Christmas to all… except for YouTube.”
Well, that’s it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have sugary candy to eat.